August 29, 2011

This is a small excerpt from my story... I started writing it not thinking it would be in the story initially, but loved it so much I had to find room to add it. There is much more to the piece but just wanted to share this moment. :)

As the new morning broke through the sky Ryell walked outside on his way to work. He looked to the East and there he could see a handful of people walking up towards the mountain. Every morning those same people made the hike and every morning Ryell watched them. Today they were noticeably one less. Clio, would never take that hike again.
                Ryell looked back at the small apartment they shared and looked upon the tiny addition that was built in the corner next to the alley way. When Clio had become too sick to make the hike Ryell made a bamboo mat and placed it in the corner. He used old ply wood and cloth to create a room. A little shrine for her to prey in. It was not the same as the vigorous walk up the mountain. Breathing the frosty mountain air and existing amongst the dew moist trees, but he wanted Clio to feel like she had a place to go. He remember how he placed the wild mountain flowers, in recycled tin and jars that he had found along the roads, around the tiny lot. He had bartered for a single stick of incense and let it fill the room with strong smoke of jasmine and wet wood. He put his bedding in a corner for her to sit on while she meditated and prayed. The room was peaceful and in its own way pretty.
                She had been sleeping when he came in to get her. He was so eager to show her the new studio. Something he could give just to her. He picked her up and carried her lame body across the apartment and through the door outside. Her arms were wrapped around his neck and she nestled her head into his neck as she watched happily to see where he was taking her. The morning was cold and the frost pinched at her nose and made her eyes dry. Even in her sickness, Clio was unaltered by her unjust fate. She smiled, laughed, and then cried as Ryell gently placed her upon the mat. She looked around the tiny temple with awe and excitement.
 “Is it wrong of me to be so happy thinking it is a gift for me, when it is really meant for God?” she asked smiling at Ryell.
He stood leaning against the door looking down at her on her knees, smiling as he shook his head. 
“No,” it’s not wrong he replied. He had never thought of it as a gift to God. It was in Ryell’s mind for Clio, and nothing more.


  1. 1) I'm so stoked you shared! :D
    2) Did you change name spellings?
    3) I like the core of the ending moment; it's very loyal, dying sibling moment.
    4) I've always wondered, how old is Clio here? Not that it needs to be included or anything (I don't think it'd fall in naturally to put it there), but I'm just curious :)

  2. LOL, nope no name spelling changes. Clio is like 15 going 16. I don't mention it. Maybe I should. It's funny only you know they are siblings cause you've read the rest of it. It never mentions that they are siblings in this piece. My sister thought they were lovers!

  3. I thought that too. They are really intimate with eachother. I liked the spiritual element of this relationship. For God or her? I don't think it matters. Both are beautiful.

  4. Thanks Quinn! It means a lot that you think the relationship and motives come off beautiful! That's what I want for them! :)

  5. There's an intimacy to this piece that makes it both stark and peaceful.

  6. Wow! Thank you, John. I'm glad it so dimensional. I really wanted that effect, but wasn't sure if I captured it.